Open wide, television viewers -- here they come again...
Good news for wide-eyed, slack-jawed droolers everywhere! Hollywood Douchebag Ryan Seacrest has seen to it that the entire extended Douchebagian family – who apparently achieved world-wide fame simply for being The Douchebagians -- will continue to pollute the television airwaves and turn brains of viewers around the globe into sentient mush for another three years.
Yes, Keeping up with the Kardashians is back and flying high, as Reality Television strives with relentless determination to lower the collective IQ of humanity, and thus make the world safe for stupidity. There is only one conclusion I can draw from such a depressing turn of events: There is no God... and She hates us.
Bring me the bucket of Kool-Aid, now...
Check that -- no Kool Aid. Not yet, anyway. Despite the relentless assault of Reality Televsion and the Forces of Darkness, civilization will not crumble into the sea so long as smart, creative people keep coming up with brilliant little gems like this. It’s only four minutes long, and well worth your time. A tip of the hat to Tim Goodman (lord and master of The Bastard Machine for pointing it out.
That's all, folks, for a while, anyway. Should all go well, I’ll be back on the Home Planet by the time this posts – a remote and primitive land where fire is the main source of heat and dial-up remains my only – and hopelessly inadequate – option for on-line access. If suitably inspired, I might hack my way through the underbrush to post something, but don’t hold your breath.
See you on the other side...
3 comments:
There may be a time in the future, when the masses awaken from their drivel-induced slumber, march on the studios with pitchforks and torches and demand better programming.
...and I shall be held accountable for my part in it. See, 90% of the work I've gotten this year has been so-called "reality TV."
I will tearfully justify my actions as just following orders as the lynch mobs kick down my door and present before me a list of my offenses - coffee runs and lockups, many long forgotten - that had facilitated the further pollution of our airwaves with such garbage...
I was young! I was innocent! I needed the money!
" The revolution will not be televised..."
Jessie --
The sad truth is, we're all Servants of Satan in this industry -- shoveling coal to fuel the boilers driving our cultural train straight through the open gates of Hell.
We take what work we can get, especially when just starting out. And never forget that no matter how bad things seem, they can always get worse. working on Reality TV sucks, but at least it's not porn.
I am no longer young or innocent, but I still need the money...
Kafka --
You're probably right, but you can bet it will be on Utube...
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